For a long time, I was stuck.
Let me back up a bit. My life had some drastic changes throughout the course of the last 10 years. I moved from Pennsylvania to Tennessee, leaving all of my family and friends behind. I moved because my heart told me that's where it belonged, with my now husband and his son Marcus. It was right. But it was not an easy transition. Moving away from a small town with everyone you have known and loved your whole life, for two people is almost shocking. I hit some major highs and lows in Tennessee-and when I say lows, I mean the lowest of lows. It was not my husband or Marcus, it was just me and the sudden changes that I had to muster through. It was really about refinding myself but that didn't come until years later.
So... I just existed in a way. I wasn't fully happy with life decisions (mostly my career choice) but I also felt stuck in it. I hated the path that early education was taking and more importantly, I hated how different it was with the kids. I can honestly look back and say my career was making me hate my life. Where did my passion go? Where did my patience go? I still loved the kids with my whole heart, I hated the job. Why? Because I was told I wasn't allowed to teach.
Excuse me?
I am a teacher. Not by trade.... by choice. I loved it. I loved knowing what a difference I was making in their lives and how cool it was to know that *I* was one of the first ones to begin their learning journey. That wasn't the case anymore. No matter what I did, it wasn't right. I was told I couldn't teach them, because then they were not doing it on their own. I was so confused by this constant statement that it made me an angry person. What do you mean they didn't choose to do it on their own? Of course they didn't, that is my job!
To make a long story short, I quit my job and went back to school to finish my degree. In the mean time, I was planning a wedding, getting married, conceiving and having a baby all in two years time. I graduated with my Bachelors, and then opened a business because I felt like if I owned it, I could do whatever I wanted. It was true, I did do all of those things and I created a solid education plan for young preschool aged kids and I was super proud of that but all the changes in my own life, and in the education system and truthfully, in parenting in the new society.... I was spent. I didn't want to wake up, I didn't want to go to work, I didn't want to feel so much pressure that parents might not be pleased with my work, or parents might sue me, or I wasn't doing my books right. The anxiety that eventually came with owning a childcare business, far exceeded my will to make a difference. It was almost debilitating. I made the decision to put the business on the market and just see what happened. It sold. I only owned the business for 2 1/2 years before selling, but in that time I accomplished SO much. I know that! I am proud of that! I am disappointed because in a way I feel as though I quit too soon, that I owed it to the kids and parents to see it through but with my husband still trying to figure out his position in the military and my kids desperate need for their mom back, I know it was the best decision for me and my family.
So, I am back being a stay-at-home mom to my two boys (ages 14 and 4) and co-pilot to my husband who is still serving the U.S. Army. I have recently joined forces with the #3 leading skincare line Rodan + Fields and have grown a huge passion for skin care. I never took care of my skin, and didn't realize how important it was until recently when looking in the mirror every day was becoming more and more of an issue. I am getting my "me" back and I am SO excited to share that with others.
I am teaching my youngest preschool at home and will definitely be sharing some great, easy learning activities to do at home. I will also be sharing some great pinterest inspired DIY projects as we go through trying to make our house, a home again.
